Garisms – Funny Stuff From A 33-Month Old Boy

Gar is currently 2 years and 9 months old. He is getting funnier. He is speaking a lot, but sometimes incoherently. Sometimes he shows how sly he can get and. He worships his brother, but is prone to jealous rages.


1. Gar loves Hello Panda biscuits and demands them constantly. To prevent him from opening one immediately, I told him to spell ‘panda’ first, thinking I could buy some time. Immediately, he started saying ‘H’, ‘E’, ‘L’, ‘L’ and ‘O’. Sorry kid, wrong password.

hello panda

2. Whenever we go to my parents’ place, he will knock on the door and say, “Arbody home?”

3. Instead of saying what is this, he says, “What der this one?”

4. Gar: I want to play Wild Crab.
Me: Wild Crab? Crabs? (deliberately not understanding him and makes crab movement)
Gar: Crab brothers! (exasperated)
Me: Oh, Wild Kratts.

Previously, he was calling them Wild Wild Wild Kratts. I only realised a few days ago that he was singing the lyrics to their theme song.

5. He also loves to play a Wild Kratts mathematical game. On a few occasions he could add 1 plus 1, up to 2 plus 2, but on most occasions, he could not, so the adults ended up playing the game for him.

wild kratts creature math2

6. In the above mentioned game, he says, “Felican not happy”. What’s a felican? Hint: It’s not a pelican. It’s a … (drum roll, please)…

wild kratts creature math


7. My husband told me that Gar had been doing this slyly over a period of time. I happened to see it for myself finally.
Gar: What der this one? (pointing to a card from El’s Chinese classes on the window, that has the Chinese phrase ‘du shu’ (study))
Hubby: Du shu
Gar: What der this one? (pointing to the card next to it)
Hubby: Dian Nao Shi (computer room)
Gar: Papa computer (requesting to go to the study to use his father’s computer to play Wild Kratts)

chinese cards

8. There is a card from his school that says “Baba” and “Mama”. It is also pasted on the window. He points to it and asks, “Where wo de baba?” I correct him and say, “wo de baba zai na li’ (Where is my papa?). He replies, “Where wo de baba zai na li”.

baba mama

9. Gar usually calls his father as ‘baba’ and El as ‘kor kor’. In the past one week or two, he suddenly started referring to them as ‘my daddy’ and ‘my brother’.

10. The boys had been using blue water bottles, but recently El got a new yellow water bottle. Gar became insanely jealous, because his favourite colour was yellow. He is really obsessed with the colour. He is always using the yellow paint.

He kicked up such a big fuss, including snatching the bottle and drinking from it even though El was germy. I had to buy a yellow water bottle for him the very next day. Since his blue water bottle was still very new, we still let him use it. He insisted on getting using his yellow bottle, despite already in bed, when he spotted El using his yellow one in the dark.

yellow piyo piyo water bottle

11. He is insanely jealous of his brother’s art work (mostly canvas paintings), and keeps asking why his brother’s works are displayed at the entrance of the house. I tell him he could only attend the classes when he turns three.

This morning, when he spotted a new painting done by his brother the day before, he repeatedly said, “Dragon?”, stressing each syllable and pumping them with emotions, “Why Kor Kor has a dragon?”

el art gallery1

I had to assure him that when he turns three, he could go for art classes.


12. He has to win his brother in everything. When we are in the car, he must get his seatbelt buckled first. If he hears the click from his brother’s seat belt first, he will get very upset.

Gar: I winner. Kor kor loser.
El: It’s ok. You win some and you lose some.
Gar: No, I winner.
El: It doesn’t matter. (and it goes on and on)

13. Spotting yellow medicine on my finger, he asks why mummy’s finger ‘tong tong’ (painful). He starts saying Ah Ma’s knees ‘tong tong’, as his grandmother had fallen down recently and applied ointment on her knees.

14. This morning, he woke up and kept shouting about why his brother hit his head on a boat. I had to decipher that. We had just gone to Alive Museum and his brother leaned back without thinking and hit his head on a boat. Does Gar dream of all the events that had taken place?

Sigh, he is influenced by his caregivers who speak broken English. I don’t know how to get him to speak grammatically and articulate well. I also do not know how to get him to be less competitive. I just hope he grows up well.

Read here for more Garisms!

garisms3 Garisms: Funny Quips From Gar

garisms4Garisms: Gar’s Quips


Why? Why? Why?

Why? Why? Why? Gar’s incessant questions on why drives me nuts sometimes. He would ask a series of questions starting with ‘why’, turn the answers into questions and then repeat the questions again.

I cannot remember the exact questions he asks, but they go something like this. Why is it dark? Why is it night time? Why does the sun go down? Why do people go home? Why do people sleep?

Moments later, he will repeat the same set of questions. A few times. He also asks questions about where his grandparents live. Sometimes, I throw the questions back to him and ask him why. That stops him from asking me more questions for a moment, and I get a brief respite. He also answers his ‘why’ questions with ‘because’.

We are watching a show about a crocodile on the loose. So big! Why crocodile drop? (It was falling from the roof.) Why crocodile run away?

He is not using his pronouns and articles properly yet. He mixes them up. It doesn’t help that other people use ungrammatical structures while speaking to him. I decided that I need to find out more.

After doing some research on why questions, I discovered that this is part of a developmental age. Children usually ask these questions when they are between three to four. Children ask the same questions over and over again when they do not have explanatory answers.

But didn’t I just try to answer? I dug deeper. Children are just curious and want to talk about something. According to Dr Green, she says,

“I’ve found that, when I try to answer children at this stage of development with the reason for something, they are left cold. After conversing with thousands of children, I’ve decided that what they really mean is, “That’s interesting to me. Let’s talk about that together. Tell me more, please?” When I’ve connected with children and begun to spin a tale to answer this question, they’ve sat enthralled. There was no need to mention because, or therefore, or cause, or effect. They don’t need to know why, all they need is animated attention and me saying whatever came to mind about that subject.”

Right after typing this, Gar came into the room and went to the toilet bowl.

He saw me working on my lap top and asked, “Why mummy working?” I decided to try out her theory, about not answering the question directly about cause and effect, but just to engage him in conversation.

Gar: Why mummy working?

Me: Are you interested in mummy working?

Gar: Yes. Mummy is working. I want to paint.

Me: Oh, you want to paint.

Gar: Yes, yellow.

Me: That is your favourite colour.

Gar: Yes, yellow. Red and blue make yellow.

Me: Red and blue make purple. Red and yellow make orange. Do you like yellow and red?

Gar: Yes, I like yellow and red. Blue also.

Me: What do you want to paint?

Gar: I want to paint yellow, red and blue.

Me: What do you want to paint? Do you want to paint dinosaurs?

Gar: Yes, I want to paint yellow T-Rex.

When he was done, he came over and told me to open the Paint programme, and asked me to draw T-Rex, in yellow, blue and purple. He wanted a huge T-Rex. I zoomed in.

Gar: I want Mummy to draw Pteranodon.

Me: Pteranodon?

Gar: Yes, Tiny Pteranodon. (referring to a character on Dinosaur Train).

I drew it for him.

Gar: I want Don.

I drew Don, a pteranodon that has a severe underbite. t rex and pteranodon With a simple insight, I actually managed to stop him from asking ‘why’ countlessly, and in turn engage him in a conversation and then spend a short but quality time with him about colours and dinosaurs. This is way different than if I had tried answering why mummy is working. Really cool. Why not give this a try when you are confronted with countless whys?

More El’s Funny Quips

I found some of these old funny quips by El collected on my laptop.

1. El’s composition
Naughty nightingale
Sings to me
naughty nightingale
On a tree
And a great big owl
Laughs at him
Ha ha ha ha

He was singing this while randomly hitting the keys on the keyboard

2. Dromedary
I was playing doodle hangman with my kid, and he actually told me what a dromedary was. I need to read up more!
By the way, it is a single-humped camel. The double-humped camel is known as Bactrian.

Dromedary Camel07. Camel Profile, near Silverton, NSW, 07.07.2007” by JjronOwn work. Licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0 via Wikimedia Commons.

Bactr<a href=
2011 Trampeltier 1528“. Licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0 via Wikimedia Commons.
3. Today is Tuesday…

This boy refuses to wear his underwear because “it says ‘Wednesday’, but ‘today is Tuesday'”.

4. Rhino the Kidnapper

I was reading a Spider-Man book with Elgin. He was fighting The Rhino who had kidnapped a boy. He asked me what ‘kidnapped’ meant, and I told him, using him as an example. After he understood the concept, he suddenly burst into tears and was very upset.

 5. Sabre Tooth Tiger

Ok, this is not a quip, but something funny he did.

We had just watched Ice Age 4, and Elgin broke his Yan Yan biscuit stick into 2 and put them in his mouth like the sabre toothed tiger.

6. I am a good storyteller.

I cannot remember the exact details, but we were talking about writing stories down. I had suggested to El to type his stories out, so that he can remember them. Then he said he did not need to do that because he could remember them. He said, “I am a good storyteller, I can remember the stories.” Not sure how he got that idea.

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